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"You don't have to swim faster than the shark, just faster than the guy next to you." - Anonymous
Sunday, April 17, 2005
The Disadvantages of Dating A Babe
So you wish you had a trophy girlfriend, do you? Sure, there are many perks to dating an incredibly hot chick. You'd be the envy of all your friends; get the best tables in restaurants; never have to pay another speeding ticket again; get to cut to the front of lines; and more.
Best of all, you'd be having sex with a gorgeous woman - daily. Not to burst your bubble - well, maybe just a little bit - but there are also many disadvantages to dating a hot chick. My research for last week’s article opened a can of worms. Don't believe me? Read on to see what I mean.
Number 10
Other men will try to sleep with her
While you can hopefully trust that your friends won't try to get her in the sack, distant colleagues and casual acquaintances are another matter. Unlike your buddies, they don't owe you any loyalty, and may not respect the fact that your girlfriend is, well, your girlfriend.
Their primal instincts will take over and they won't be able to stop themselves from putting the moves on her when your back is turned. Actually, some of them may not even wait that long.
Number 9
You'll fight with guys you don't even know
If another man starts to put the moves on your woman, and you tell him to back off, and he doesn't, things may get ugly. Even if you were formerly a pacifist, and a gentleman, the male attention that your woman will constantly garner will have you learning Muay Thai in no time.
Number 8
You'll become jealous and possessive
So, you're not the jealous type? Think again; this woman will turn you green in no time. Even if she is 100% faithful, the fact that good-looking guys are always ogling her and talking to her will drive you nuts. Pretty soon, you may find yourself not wanting her to talk to anyone but you, which will eventually drive her nuts. Brace yourself, my friend.
Number 7
No one will notice you in her presence
When the two of you make an entrance, others may not even notice that you are there at all. Everyone's eyes will be on her, and you will inevitably fall into oblivion. If you aren't the insecure, attention-seeking type, this may not bother you. In fact, you'll just be proud that the object of everyone's attention is there with you.
On the other hand, if you always have to be the man of the hour, you may become resentful of the fact that she is constantly stealing the spotlight. Unless, of course, you are incredibly handsome, in which case, people will ogle both of you equally.
Number 6
People will assume that she wants you for your money
While men are trying to pick their tongues up from off the floor and women are looking for a flaw of hers to dwell on, they will invariably start to talk about her and the guy she's with (that's you, dude).
Unfortunately, the first thing they will likely assume is that you're loaded, which is why you've got a babe on your arm. It doesn't matter whether or not this is actually the case; people love to gossip.
Number 5
She can easily manipulate you
The next thing people will think is that she has you under her thumb (poor bastard). The worst part? Maybe she does. Think that that would never happen to you? Don't be so sure.
Do you find yourself obliging her every request just because she flashes that incredible smile of hers your way? Does she get away with everything? Watch out. Although it may be your pleasure now, if you are always the one doing things for her, and she never appreciates or reciprocates these actions, you will soon grow resentful of her.
Number 4
It will be harder to trust her
This leads nicely into my next point. And that is: it is harder to trust a hot chick than an average-looking chick because a hot chick can usually get whatever she desires, whether it's another man or another pair of shoes.
You may spend your time away from her wondering what she's up to, and whether or not she has your best interests at heart, or merely her own. You will wonder whether or not it is even possible for her to go out with her girlfriends and not pick up some guys along the way.
Number 3
You'll be insecure
While you are wondering whether or not she is trustworthy, that annoying little voice in your head that always gets you to second-guess yourself will emerge and tell you that your doubts are indeed well-founded and that she is out to do you harm.
You will start to call her constantly, even in the middle of the night, and show up wherever she is "just to say hi." No, she won't find it sweet; she'll find it sick.
Number 2
Her ego could be a problem
A really hot chick who doesn't know how hot she is, is hard to find. Chances are that your babe has been complimented on her looks so many times that by now, her head is a little bigger than most girls'. In fact, she may be downright egotistical.
She may honestly think that she is the prettiest, smartest, most talented, most fun woman in the room... all the time. Can you honestly deal with someone like that?
Number 1
You may stay with her for the wrong reasons
You may become blinded by her looks that you overlook (pun intended) any serious personality flaws that she may have. You will find yourself justifying the fact that she is an egomaniac, or unfaithful, for example, just so you can stay with her.
In writing this, I am by no means saying that you should date dogs exclusively. I am merely pointing out the most widely experienced drawbacks of dating a hot chick, so that when you do, you are aware of them and are thus less likely to fall prey to her charms. Sort of to balance last week’s article.
Find what you're looking for
If you remember to keep your sense of pride and self-esteem about you, and refuse to let her even think for a second that she can walk all over you, you will be able to enjoy your hottie without getting caught up in any of the unpleasant scenarios mentioned above. Now, go find yourself a hot date.
Best of all, you'd be having sex with a gorgeous woman - daily. Not to burst your bubble - well, maybe just a little bit - but there are also many disadvantages to dating a hot chick. My research for last week’s article opened a can of worms. Don't believe me? Read on to see what I mean.
Number 10
Other men will try to sleep with her
While you can hopefully trust that your friends won't try to get her in the sack, distant colleagues and casual acquaintances are another matter. Unlike your buddies, they don't owe you any loyalty, and may not respect the fact that your girlfriend is, well, your girlfriend.
Their primal instincts will take over and they won't be able to stop themselves from putting the moves on her when your back is turned. Actually, some of them may not even wait that long.
Number 9
You'll fight with guys you don't even know
If another man starts to put the moves on your woman, and you tell him to back off, and he doesn't, things may get ugly. Even if you were formerly a pacifist, and a gentleman, the male attention that your woman will constantly garner will have you learning Muay Thai in no time.
Number 8
You'll become jealous and possessive
So, you're not the jealous type? Think again; this woman will turn you green in no time. Even if she is 100% faithful, the fact that good-looking guys are always ogling her and talking to her will drive you nuts. Pretty soon, you may find yourself not wanting her to talk to anyone but you, which will eventually drive her nuts. Brace yourself, my friend.
Number 7
No one will notice you in her presence
When the two of you make an entrance, others may not even notice that you are there at all. Everyone's eyes will be on her, and you will inevitably fall into oblivion. If you aren't the insecure, attention-seeking type, this may not bother you. In fact, you'll just be proud that the object of everyone's attention is there with you.
On the other hand, if you always have to be the man of the hour, you may become resentful of the fact that she is constantly stealing the spotlight. Unless, of course, you are incredibly handsome, in which case, people will ogle both of you equally.
Number 6
People will assume that she wants you for your money
While men are trying to pick their tongues up from off the floor and women are looking for a flaw of hers to dwell on, they will invariably start to talk about her and the guy she's with (that's you, dude).
Unfortunately, the first thing they will likely assume is that you're loaded, which is why you've got a babe on your arm. It doesn't matter whether or not this is actually the case; people love to gossip.
Number 5
She can easily manipulate you
The next thing people will think is that she has you under her thumb (poor bastard). The worst part? Maybe she does. Think that that would never happen to you? Don't be so sure.
Do you find yourself obliging her every request just because she flashes that incredible smile of hers your way? Does she get away with everything? Watch out. Although it may be your pleasure now, if you are always the one doing things for her, and she never appreciates or reciprocates these actions, you will soon grow resentful of her.
Number 4
It will be harder to trust her
This leads nicely into my next point. And that is: it is harder to trust a hot chick than an average-looking chick because a hot chick can usually get whatever she desires, whether it's another man or another pair of shoes.
You may spend your time away from her wondering what she's up to, and whether or not she has your best interests at heart, or merely her own. You will wonder whether or not it is even possible for her to go out with her girlfriends and not pick up some guys along the way.
Number 3
You'll be insecure
While you are wondering whether or not she is trustworthy, that annoying little voice in your head that always gets you to second-guess yourself will emerge and tell you that your doubts are indeed well-founded and that she is out to do you harm.
You will start to call her constantly, even in the middle of the night, and show up wherever she is "just to say hi." No, she won't find it sweet; she'll find it sick.
Number 2
Her ego could be a problem
A really hot chick who doesn't know how hot she is, is hard to find. Chances are that your babe has been complimented on her looks so many times that by now, her head is a little bigger than most girls'. In fact, she may be downright egotistical.
She may honestly think that she is the prettiest, smartest, most talented, most fun woman in the room... all the time. Can you honestly deal with someone like that?
Number 1
You may stay with her for the wrong reasons
You may become blinded by her looks that you overlook (pun intended) any serious personality flaws that she may have. You will find yourself justifying the fact that she is an egomaniac, or unfaithful, for example, just so you can stay with her.
In writing this, I am by no means saying that you should date dogs exclusively. I am merely pointing out the most widely experienced drawbacks of dating a hot chick, so that when you do, you are aware of them and are thus less likely to fall prey to her charms. Sort of to balance last week’s article.
Find what you're looking for
If you remember to keep your sense of pride and self-esteem about you, and refuse to let her even think for a second that she can walk all over you, you will be able to enjoy your hottie without getting caught up in any of the unpleasant scenarios mentioned above. Now, go find yourself a hot date.
For the Indian new year, my friend Gwen M treated me to a 20 dish Kerala Sadhya Vegetarian lunch at Restaurant Kallianees.
Kallianees is at 16 Lorong Yap Kwan Seng
t/f: +603 21610616 e:kalianee@streamyx.com
Sunday, April 10, 2005
Why Do Beautiful Women Date Ugly Men?
It's a typical boys’ night out and on our way to the Loft in Heritage Row, we walk by a couple holding hands. The woman had what I like to call a "triple-take" face: I looked at her three times before I noticed her boyfriend was about to hit me over the head. Luckily for me, I was surrounded by six friends and so the worst thing that happened was a "watch it you sonuva bitch" killer stare.
This woman was hothothot! Not only did she have a tight dress to show off her curves, she also had the face of an angel. Then it dawned on me; the chunky Ron Jeremy [the famous porn star] look-a-like boyfriend didn't really have the looks to merit such a beautiful girlfriend. What was so bloody special about him?
I did not spend too much time thinking about it until we walked by another unusually mismatched couple. As my buddies and I entered the club, a two hundred-pound (I'm not talking muscle here), short and bald man (visualise Jason Alexander from Seinfeld) walked by me with this gorgeous woman that made Denise Keller look like a plain Jane.
Okay, now things were fishy, and I hadn’t even had a drop of alcohol yet. I saw too many inequitable couples within a span of twenty minutes. As far as I know, there is no shortage of good-looking men (G-men) nor is there a high supply of gorgeous women to go around for everyone. How can beautiful women date such ugly men (U-men)? Or better yet, how can U-men land such oompaloompa women?
false assumptions
What can she possibly see in him? It must be the cash, and judging by her looks, he must have a lot of it. This is probably the very first thought that goes through most G-men's minds.
This assumption cannot be further from the truth. True, having financial stability does help a man find a beautiful woman, but this is not the most important aspect. It's the combination of several traits that will help a man find the woman of his dreams.
As long as men keep reasoning that beautiful women date ugly or regular-looking men for their money, they will always miss out on opportunities to meet gorgeous women. Like my father used to say, "Son, assumptions are the mother of all screw ups. Never assume anything with women - unless it's an acrobatic sex position."
If U-men don't need cash to bait beautiful women, then what's their secret weapon? What are the traits that will help a regular looking Joe like myself (stretch your goddam imagination a bit willya?) land a girlfriend like Bernie Chan?
So for the last one week I’ve scoured the streets of Kuala Lumpur buying U-men plenty of Carlsberg and learning their secrets for you. Trust me, it wasn’t easy. Especially when they mistook me for a faggot and wanted to kick me in the arse.
the ugly secret
Over the years, U-men have developed two kinds of strategies to date beautiful women. The first strategy is called Scouting For Beauty, and involves looking for undiscovered, up-and-coming beautiful women.
The second strategy is called Impressing the Beauty, and involves impressing a beautiful woman who has no boyfriend and is sick of all the head games played by G-men. All she wants is an honest, trustworthy, fun man who can bring stability into her life.
scouting for beauty
U-men have learned to adapt their dating skills. Just like a blind man learns to develop his other senses, a U-man relies less on his looks and learns to heighten his other traits.
The mistake most men make is to assume (yes dad, the mother of all screw ups) that every beautiful woman is born beautiful. In general, men have their radars fine-tuned for beautiful women dressed in sexy clothing as they ignore every other woman around them.
G-men assume that to date a beautiful woman, you have to look for a beautiful woman. This is where the U-man outwits the G-man.
While G-men are checking out the "all-star" women, who are already dating and usually spoiled rotten with attention, the U-men are doing a Jerry McGuire and scouting for "rookies" or potential superstars. The U-man learns to spot potential beauty within a regular looking woman before G-men do.
These rookies are usually good-looking women who don't know they have the potential to be hot. They mostly have low self-esteem, lack personal style and undeveloped sex appeal. The U-men recognize their potential and move in.
Because these rookies don't have G-men courting them, they have low self-esteem and have no reason to fix themselves up, until the U-man comes along. The U-man compliments the rookie and makes her feel good about herself.
Eventually, rookie girl develops a liking for the U-man. For this reason, she begins to dress and fix herself in a stylish manner. The U-man readily accompanies the rookie shopping and suggests sexy clothing to the ready-to-impress girlfriend.
By the time the U-man is finished with her, he has produced a sophisticated, well-dressed woman who oozes sex appeal from every pore, while all the G-men are left wondering, “oh fuckadoodle! How could I have missed her?” Man, does she look good when she’s fixed herself up.
Scouting is good, but it's not enough. The U-man knows that he has to work hard to keep his new found ‘star’. The U-man now has to sign her to a long-term contract before she is swooped away by a smooth G-man.
sign her to a long-term contract
The problem with a rookie is that once she realizes she's hot, and every man in the room is looking at her, it doesn’t take her long to wonder if maybe she can upgrade to a G-man. Duh!
Before the makeover, she thought she had no chance of dating any G-man. But now that she's "New & Improved," she'll be tempted to test the waters. Show me the money!
Of course, the U-man knows this will happen, and therefore prepares to lock her in and position himself as an addiction to his girlfriend. This means that he will offer her everything a woman desires in a man - minus the good looks. The U-man then becomes:
A Smooth Talker
He speaks with confidence and says the right words to make her feel good about herself. The U-man is capable of having an interesting and intelligent conversation.
Fun & Spontaneous
Most women love to have fun and live in the spur of the moment. They love to be in the company of men who can make them laugh and bring excitement to their lives.
Most G-men rely so heavily on their good looks alone to impress women that they forget to make the date exciting. U-men know this and use it to their advantage by planning fun dates in advance such as weekend getaways, dinners at exotic restaurants, horseback riding, rafting, canoeing, mountain climbing, scuba diving, boating, cycling, and even dance lessons. The idea is to not fall victim to the routine trap.
A Real Man
A woman wants a man who can romance her and make her feel special; not only for her body, but also for her mind and soul. She knows that good lovers are hard to find. So if the U-man can make sensual love to her body and mind at the same time, he'll have her signed for life.
A Mature Man
Keeping the relationship fun and exciting is very important. But a man has to realize that life is not all fun and games. A woman likes to know that she can count on her man to provide her with spiritual and financial stability.
impressing beauty
A U-man does not always look for an undiscovered woman; there are cases where U-men approach and date gorgeous women. How do they do it? They don't assume (yes dad, sigh…once again – the mother of all screw ups) anything about beautiful women.
We've all heard of the expression, "poor little rich girl," where a rich woman cannot find true love because the men either want her money or are too intimidated by her rich blood. Well, Paris Hilton has company - the same applies to beautiful women.
Believe it or not, beautiful women have a hard time meeting men. The reason being that most men are intimidated by their looks. They think that because she looks good, she must be high maintenance, hard to get, already dating, and snobby to boot.
The few men that do have the balls to approach her are all players who like to play head games just to get into her panties and claim her as a trophy.
U-men that date beautiful women know this. They know that in most cases, beautiful women are single, fed up of head games and craving for a real man to approach them and desire them for who they are and not solely for their bodies.
Therefore the U-man must always be one step ahead of the game; he has nothing to lose and everything to gain. And how - it’s a highly rewarding pursuit.
Sunday, April 03, 2005
can you feel the sea breeze? doesn't that carlsberg taste bloody good?
The Wave - rising from the ashes in Kuta, Bali
Damn! Damn! Damn! Why does shit like this happen to me? In my grubby little paws lay an envelope with an invitation to the opening of the Wave in Kuta, Bali, Indonesia.
Bloody problem was it was in 2 hours time. No doubt the press release was dated the 15th of March but I received on the day of the opening itself, the 1st of April. Bloody hell!
I was pissed. What with Airasia and my hotel contacts, this should have been a walk in the park and a bloody good excuse to check it out at minimal cost to the old pocket book. Sigh…
Well, needless to say I missed the bus or rather the bloody flight but from what I can see, it looks brilliant - a new chic restaurant, coffee bar and dance club housed in a superbly crafted complex and set to engulf Bali’s Kuta beachfront in a massive way.
Built on ground zero, The Wave’s address of No. 1 Kuta is both monumental in size as well as historical significance. It is this exact spot where Bali tourism as we know it began.
The Wave is located on the famous corner next to Hard Rock Bali, and it is here that the fledgling surfing community started burgeoning about 30 to 40 years ago. In recent years however, the nightlife has dispersed from this central point to the outskirts and other centres such as Nusa Dua, Seminyak and Ubud.
The Club:
With an elaborate Nexo sound system, it promises entertainment for up to 800 stylish happy-makers with food served right through. A kaleidoscope of images play across the surface of an entire wall facing the bar while the dance floor action takes place, designer stools beckon tired feet, and comfy sofas and settees prepare to wrap around groups of friends. If the beach is missed, the al fresco sitting area has a great ocean view.
Sailfin Restaurant:
Boasting culinary delights from acclaimed seafood chef Jesse Lee, fine dining makes its debut in Bali. Sailfin’s modern retro interior design combines Ralph Lauren with resort homes in the Caribbean with a strong balcony feel – transforming meals into extraordinary experiences whether it be a late white wine lunch or romantic sunset dinner.
Contact: The Wave, Bali
Kryn Wolszczak, General Manager
P. Mohan, General Manager of Operations
Phone: +62.361.760.068
Add: Jl. Pantai Kuta 1, Kuta, Denpasar 80361, Bali, Indonesia
info@wave-kuta.com
www.wave-kuta.com
Bloody problem was it was in 2 hours time. No doubt the press release was dated the 15th of March but I received on the day of the opening itself, the 1st of April. Bloody hell!
I was pissed. What with Airasia and my hotel contacts, this should have been a walk in the park and a bloody good excuse to check it out at minimal cost to the old pocket book. Sigh…
Well, needless to say I missed the bus or rather the bloody flight but from what I can see, it looks brilliant - a new chic restaurant, coffee bar and dance club housed in a superbly crafted complex and set to engulf Bali’s Kuta beachfront in a massive way.
Built on ground zero, The Wave’s address of No. 1 Kuta is both monumental in size as well as historical significance. It is this exact spot where Bali tourism as we know it began.
The Wave is located on the famous corner next to Hard Rock Bali, and it is here that the fledgling surfing community started burgeoning about 30 to 40 years ago. In recent years however, the nightlife has dispersed from this central point to the outskirts and other centres such as Nusa Dua, Seminyak and Ubud.
The Club:
With an elaborate Nexo sound system, it promises entertainment for up to 800 stylish happy-makers with food served right through. A kaleidoscope of images play across the surface of an entire wall facing the bar while the dance floor action takes place, designer stools beckon tired feet, and comfy sofas and settees prepare to wrap around groups of friends. If the beach is missed, the al fresco sitting area has a great ocean view.
Sailfin Restaurant:
Boasting culinary delights from acclaimed seafood chef Jesse Lee, fine dining makes its debut in Bali. Sailfin’s modern retro interior design combines Ralph Lauren with resort homes in the Caribbean with a strong balcony feel – transforming meals into extraordinary experiences whether it be a late white wine lunch or romantic sunset dinner.
Contact: The Wave, Bali
Kryn Wolszczak, General Manager
P. Mohan, General Manager of Operations
Phone: +62.361.760.068
Add: Jl. Pantai Kuta 1, Kuta, Denpasar 80361, Bali, Indonesia
info@wave-kuta.com
www.wave-kuta.com
Media Inquiries: Malaysia
Adeline Loh, Press Liaison
Phone: 03-8062 2511 / 012-311 3553
wyldriot@nasioncom.net
for local happenings, there's an absolulety brilliant site called "smoove". just click on the link on the right.
Could the Blogs Have Saved Terri Schiavo?
Pegged to sad story of Terri Schiavo, US News & World Report columnist John Leo had a provocative recent piece on red versus blue bioethics: "A key factor in the rise of bioethics, he wrote, was the 'emergence ideologically of a form of bioethics that dovetailed nicely with the reigning political liberalism of the educated classes in America.'
Instead of the traditional emphasis on the sanctity of life, bioethics began to stress the quality of life, meaning that many damaged humans, young and old, don't qualify for personhood because their lives have lost value. The nonpersons should be allowed to die and in some cases be killed.
This explains why so few bioethicists have protested what the state and her estranged husband planned for Terri Schiavo, who is severely damaged, but not in pain or dying, not brain dead, and in no position to protest her own execution on grounds that other people consider it best for her."
Leo wrote that the mainstream media is blue. This raises a question: Could bloggers, who have demolished so many blue media stories, have saved Terri Schiavo, if the blogosphere had been operative in the beginning?
What do we really know about Michael Schiavo's new life with his new family? Would blog reports on such matters have changed the dynamics of the story? By the time the blogosphere had emerged as a force, the American legal system had already doomed Terri Schiavo.
